How do you find religion is it faux passe thing or is it something important in your life? Did you become more religious or irreligious over time? What do you think it is social impact of your religion or irreligion on society around you?

I had mental break down when I was 24 or so and had grand religious delusions, afterwards I developed somewhat ambiguous relationship with religion. I was like why did medicine help me but all the praying and stuff didn't? Anyway what followed was long period of personal uncertainty but slowly I rebuilt my faith. You might wonder didn't the fact that science triumph over religion in my treatment convenience me otherwise. Which is only logical.

I counter, well, I remember throwing myself in front of the alter at my local church and I started vomiting, something gurgled and some sort of thing came out of my mouth, as shit as it sounds it did happen and well, it shook me and I thought it was mostly due to hallucinations. I was sort off involved with kvlt things at the time. So It might be possible that I was possessed at the time or still am.

Anyway its besides the point long period of irreligion followed, I only slowly became more religious over time again, mostly due to my readings of Aristotle and Plato as well as St. Augustine. IMHO religion and science are contributing force to the advancement of humanity.

As someone living next to a church with a particularly annoying bell, Christianity was physically close to me but spiritually distant for most of my life. I'm a curious cat though, I like to look at the World multiple angles even if I have favorites, so I looked into it in hopes I may find some nuggets of wisdom or divinity. I was not looking to convert or anything, by then I had my muses. That was… kind of a mistake. I looked for a god yet all I found was a corpse. Further behind it, I found an entire cemetary even. "You're broken, and you must do what I say or else suffer forever and have nobody else to blame." is a running theme I've started to see all over after that, spreading like a disease, infecting one religion after another. It left me extremely disillusioned with humanity and its relation to faith and spirituality in total. The resentment never went away fully after that. I think I understand why Marx and Nietzche called it the "opiate of the masses", and the "European drug that ruined the Americas" respectively: it's a powerful sedative that gets you high on hope, addicted through despair and keeps the dealer's hands clean.

There has been a project that's been in the back of my mind ever since which I've dubbed "Class St.", a tongue-in-cheek reference to Class S, specifically its revival in the form of stories of "girls attending Catholic schools who fall in love" that was popular in the early-to-mid 2000s. While those use religion purely for aesthetic purity though, this one would lean a lot more into deconstructing it — with one of the puppy girl protagonists being a terrified and traumatized wallflower while the other one is an outspoken devout who recieved prophecy from a near-death-experience that seems to run contrary to the estabilished teachings. As William James would refer to George Fox's experiences on the matter:

And to me — as an occultist — such intimate, personal experiences are infinitely more valuable than mere dogma that uses its scripture as its carrot and a cudgel.

I am in a strange place at the minute concerning spirituality/religion. I don't really believe in God but I guess I believe in the soul, or some kind of higher layer, above the mundane.

It feels like there is too much meaning in everything for the world to be simple physics and chemistry, there is an electric element that is hard to describe but is making its presence felt more and more as time passes and I experience more of the world.

I was raised Catholic and never felt anything for it, even when I was a small child, this feels very different, alive and natural, self evident.